Peacocks
by Arsinyk
Summary: ONE SHOT Narcissa and Lily were lovers, until Voldemort murdered Lily. Warning: femslash


Summery: Narcissa and Lily were secretly lovers ever since their school days, but then Voldemort kills Lily, leaving Narcissa alone. Warning: femslash

Disclaimer: Just in case you think I'm J.K. Rowling, I'm not. I don't own any of these characters. I'm just borrowing them. Don't sue me, I'm broke.

A/N: For some reason I started wondering about religion in the wizarding world and ended up deciding that it would be interesting if Narcissa was secretly Jewish. Please don't ask why; I'm just weird like that. I had a history of the entire wizarding world and their religious beliefs somewhere, but I can't find it anymore. But it included a small number of wealthy, pureblood wizards who were secretly Jewish, and Narcissa was one of them.

* * *

January 6, 1971

Narcissa slipped through the door to the Room of Requirement. Lily was already there, seated on the bed.

The room, though lacking windows, was brightly lit by several floating candles. The floors were covered by a soft, lush, dark red carpet. On the opposite side of the room was a canopied four-poster bed. On her right, a large bookshelf and a desk were pushed up against the wall. To her left was a dark blue sofa with a coffee table. Lily sat on the sofa with her bag on the floor next to her.

Narcissa paused a moment to look at Lily. Long, silky, wavy ruddy brown hair fell about the girl's shoulders, framing her sweet, round face. Wide, sparkling, bright green eyes and soft red lips smiled a warm welcome at Narcissa. Lightly tanned skin, warm and soft, seemed almost to glow in the gentle candlelight, begging to be touched, caressed. She wore a short, black schoolgirl skirt, red knee socks, and a long-sleeved red blouse. Her Hogwarts robes were neatly folded over the arm of the sofa. She looked the very image of a prefect. The sweet, innocent little schoolgirl.

**_My_**_ Lily_, Narcissa thought with a slight smile.

She walked over and dropped her own bag next to sofa.

"Hey." Lily's voice was beautiful – soft, gentle, warm, kind, musical.

"Hi, Flower."

Lily reached into her bag and withdrew several pastries. Setting them on the table, she asked "Ready to study, Peacock?"

Narcissa got out her books. "How's Lupin?"

Lily bit her lip. "He's… okay."

Narcissa looked at the other girl sharply. "…okay?"

"I think he had an argument with James."

"About what?"

"I don't know, but they aren't talking anymore. Sirius is actually siding with Lupin, this time, so what ever happened, James must have been being really stupid."

"More so than usual?"

Lily gave a soft laugh. "If Sirius is siding against him he was definitely being more stupid than usual."

"Are you certain that's possible? Maybe Sirius is trying to make you the next conquest in his 'competition' with Lucius by siding with your boyfriend. Double points for you being a 'virgin'." Narcissa joked.

Lily made a face. "There is no way I'm sleeping with _that_ slut just for the sake of his 'competition' with Lucius. So, how is Lucius?"

Narcissa shrugged. "A bit miffed at having fallen behind in his competition with Sirius. But pleased at having won his last verbal sparring session with James. James has been really off ever since you started dating Lupin. I think he's jealous of him. That's probably what their fight was about."

Lily blinked. "Jealous of what? That Lupin got tired of being harassed for not having a girlfriend, tired of lying to everyone, tired of having his friends trying to set him up with a girl and decided to tell me the truth?"

"James doesn't know that. All he knows is that his friend, who has never before expressed any interest in girls at all, is now dating the girl James has liked for what, two years now? Ever since our fourth year. The girl who has never dated _anyone_ before. Trust me, if I didn't know what was going on, I'd hate Lupin too."

"Anyway, we have a test in potions tomorrow and I want to actually get some _studying _done tonight."

Narcissa laughed. "Yes, My Flower."

  


December 27, 1972

The early morning light streamed in through the open window of the Gryffindor Girls' Dormitory. Lily was the only seventh year girl staying at Hogwarts over Christmas break, so they were able to sleep in her dorm instead of the Room of Requirement. It was nice to be able to wake up with Narcissa and see the sunlight pouring in.

Lily watched Narcissa sleeping. Smooth, silky, ivory skin gleamed in the sunlight. Long, soft, dyed black hair, mussed with sleep, fell about her sharp, angular face. Pale pink lips were curved into a slight smile. Pale blond eyelashes, for once lacking their usual black mascara slowly fluttered open.

The seventeen-year-old pureblood witch smiled sleepily at her lover with silvery blue eyes. Lily lightly stroked the girl's porcelain face. Narcissa lifted a graceful, long fingered hand to Lily's hair.

"I wish this could last forever," Narcissa whispered.

Lily lightly kissed her soft, sweet lips.

"We should get up. Before everyone else, so I can get back to my room without getting caught."

Lily nodded. Narcissa sat up, swinging long, slender legs over the side of the bed. Lily watched from the bed as her lover pulled on silk underpants, fastened her bra, both black in contrast with her milky pale skin. She pulled on a floor length, black skirt that clung to her legs and pooled gracefully about her feet. The she slipped into a low collared corset-like black shirt with loose sleeves. Over that she pulled her Hogwarts robes. Last she slid her feet into black, knee high boots.

Lily got up, pulling on her own loose blue shirt, loose, floor length, black skirt and her Hogwarts robes while Narcissa put on her makeup.

Lily glanced at the clock. It was 6 am. The odds of anyone being awake at all were slim, but she didn't want to take the chance. If someone found out about her and Narcissa… She didn't want to think about it.

Lily lifted her mirror and cast a Finding Spell. "Gryffindor Common Room," she murmured. The image in the mirror shifted and she saw the Common Room. The only person in it was Lupin. She dismissed the spell and nodded at Narcissa. Together they descended the stairs.

Lupin looked up as they entered the room. He gave them a small smile of greeting and went back to the book he had been reading. Just before the portrait hole they stopped and faced each other.

Narcissa kissed Lily. Lily hugged the other girl and stepped back. "Good-bye," she whispered.

"Shalom," Narcissa murmured back. Then she turned and climbed through the portrait hole.

  


  


  


November 1, 1981

Narcissa stared at Lucius in shock. "What did you say?" she asked him hoarsely. She had to have heard him wrong. Lily…

"The Dark Lord attacked the Potters last night and killed both Lily and James. He tried to kill their son and… died in the attempt."

Narcissa shook her head. "No," she breathed. "No…"

Lucius laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I know it's hard to understand, that the Dark Lord is gone, but–"

She looked at him in disgust. "You bastard! You blind, cold, heartless bastard. You're as bad as he is."

Lucius tensed. "Narcissa, please–"

"No! Just leave me alone!"

Lucius looked at her coldly.

"You knew," she whispered. "You knew he was going to… to kill Lily. You _knew_ and you didn't do anything. You _let_ him!" she screamed, slapping him across the face. "You cold" _slap_ "heartless" _slap_ "bastard!" and with that she attacked him, clawing at his face, kicking and screaming and biting at him.

He caught her by the shoulder and pinned her against the wall until she relaxed in his grip and fell to the floor, weeping.

Lucius watched her for a moment. "You will not mention her again. You will not say her name; you will not discuss her with _anyone_, not even the house elves… You will forget that she was ever born, that _any _of them ever existed. If you ever so much as _think_ of her again, I _swear_ I will kill you. Understand?"

Narcissa just stared at him, her hand going instinctively to the locket Lily had given her.

Lucius reached down and grabbed the locked from her, yanking it from her neck. He opened in, glanced at the pictures inside, then glanced at Narcissa.

"Your grandmother gave this to you, hmm?"

Narcissa stared silently at him. He shook his head and threw the locket into the trash, then turned back to Narcissa.

"You will not mention her again. _Do you understand_?"

Narcissa nodded mutely.

"Say it. Say you won't speak of her again."

"I… I won't talk about… her again. I promise."

"Oh, and from now on, you are Christian. You will not practice Judaism under my roof ever again. Understand?"

"Yes."

Lucius nodded, apparently satisfied, and left the room. Once he was gone, Narcissa drew her knees up to her chest and began to sob quietly, feeling more hollow and lost than she had since her mother had died when she was twelve.

When she had cried herself out, she sat staring blankly into space for a long time until.

Hours later she got up. Her nose felt stuffed, her eyes swollen and sore, her muscles stiff, and her neck stung where the chain of her lock had been pulled against it when Lucius broke it. Her head hurt from crying so much. She walked over and looked through the trash until she found the locket. She looked at it for a moment, then shoved it in her pocket and left the room.

  
  


October 31, 1983

Draco, just three years old, entered his mother's private chamber at Malfoy Manor. Narcissa spun around at the sound of the door opening, eyes wide with fright. Then she saw Draco and sighed with relief.

"Draco," she said relief obvious in her voice. Her eyes, filled with grief, were bright and a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"What's wrong, Mommy?" Draco asked her.

She gave him a sad smile. "Nothing, sweetheart."

"What are you doing?" Draco asked.

"Remembering someone very special to me," she told him softly.

Draco walked over to his mother and hugged her. She held him tightly to her chest.

"You mustn't tell anyone about this, Draco," she whispered into his hair. He looked up into her face.

"Not even Daddy?"

"Especially not Daddy. Promise me you won't tell, Draco?"

"I promise," he told her solemnly.

Narcissa squeezed him again, then rose. Holding his small hand in hers, Narcissa faced the fireplace. On the mantle was a single candle, brightly burning. A single flame giving a brief warmth and light that would so swiftly burn away to nothing, leaving only behind only memories and grief. Just like Lily's life.


End file.
